Tuesday, 1 November 2011

why drink tea?

Enough with my measured, careful claims about tea and its benefits.

Why should you drink tea?

Immortality of course.  If you drink tea, especially good tea, you'll live forever.

No death.  Minimal disease.  You'll be invited to all the best parties.  Can I prove it?  Nope.  Do I have any empirical evidence?  Evidence schmevidance.

You'll live forever.  Basta.

Smile.  Enjoy yourself.  It's going to be a long one.

(Warning: the claims made in this blogpost are not remotely based on fact or any connection to reality whatsoever. That doesn't necessarily mean they're not true)


  1. For you and this post, I wrote this. ;-)

    On immortal wings
    I sip with contemplation
    My life in this cup

  2. I've been saying this for years. Do I know you?

  3. I thought you said IMMORALITY. Why do I even come in here?

  4. The people at Teavana will totally back you up on that. It is the antioxidants. However, if you base your tea consumption on those people, drinking tea will also make you grow long hair and a goatee.

  5. Wouldn't high levels of antioxidants stop our bodies from absorbing the oxygen properly? And lead to us slowly suffocate... So tea will actually kill you!

  6. I drink tea cuz I wanna. Too simple? :)

  7. I've dealt with the *tea will kill you* issue in the previous blogpost. It's nearly as undeniable a fact as the *tea will make you immortal* thing.

    And just to be very clear: tea does NOT make the hippie. The hippie makes the tea. Think about it for a minute. It's deep, man.

  8. Wow, in your photo, it's Boston ivy, Parthenocissus tricuspidata, the ivy of the Ivy League...which, incidentally, was imported from China or Japan.